Technology as seen by Country Folk ~ Bob

1. LOG ON: Makin' a wood stove hotter.

2. LOG OFF: Don't add no more wood.

3. MONITOR: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.

4. DOWNLOAD: Gettin' the firewood off the truck.

5. MEGA HERTZ: When your not careful gettin' the firewood.

6. FLOPPY DISC: What'cha git from tryin' to carry too much firewood.

7. RAM: That thar thing whut splits the firewood.

8. HARD DRIVE: Gettin' home in the winter time.

9. PROMPT: Whut the mail ain't in the winter time.

10. WINDOWS: Whut to shut wen it's cold outside.

11. SCREEN: Whut to shut wen it's black fly season.

12. BYTE: Whut them dang flys do.

13. CHIP: Munchies for the TV.

14. MICRO CHIP: Whut's in the bottom of the munchie bag.

15. MODEM: Whut 'cha did to the hay fields.

16. DOT MATRIX: Old Dan Matrix's wife.

17. LAP TOP: Whar the kitty sleeps.

18. KEYBOARD: Whar you hang the dang keys.

19. SOFTWARE: Them dang plastic forks and knifes.

20. MOUSE: Whut eats the grain in the barn.

21. MAINFRAME: Holds up the barn roof.

22. PORT: Fancy Flatlander wine

23. ENTER: Northerner talk for "C'mon in y'all"

24. RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: When you can't remember whut you paid for the rifle

25. MOUSE PAD: That hippie talk for the rat hole.