Exercise Theory ~ Tim Potter
The Potter Philosophy on Exercising:
1. It is well documented
that for every mile that you jog, you
add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old
to
spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per
month.
2. My grandmother started
walking five miles a day when she
was 60. She's 97 now and we don't know where she is.
3. The only reason I would
take up jogging is so that I could
hear heavy breathing again.
4. I joined a health club
last year, spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
5. I have to exercise early
in the morning before my brain
figures out what I'm doing.
6. I don't exercise at all.
If God meant us to touch our toes,
he would have put them further up on our body.
7. I like long walks, especially
when they are taken by people
who annoy me.
8. I have flabby thighs,
but fortunately my stomach covers
them.
9. The advantage of exercising
every day is that you die
healthier.
10. If you are going to
try cross-country skiing, start with a
small country.
And last but not least:
11. I don't jog, it makes
the ice jump right out of my glass.
Now unlike Tim, I know that
physical exercise is good for you.
I've listed below my program of strenuous activities.
You are invited to use my program without charge.
1) Beating around the bush
2) Jumping to conclusions
3) Climbing the walls
4) Swallowing my pride
5) Passing the buck
6) Throwing my weight around
7) Dragging my heels
8) Pushing my luck
9) Making mountains out of molehills
10) Hitting the nail on the head
11) Wading through paperwork
12) Bending over backwards
13) Jumping on the bandwagon
14) Balancing the books
15) Running around in circles
16) Tooting my own horn
17) Climbing the ladder of success
18) Pulling out the stops
19) Adding fuel to the fire
20) Opening a can of worms
21) Putting my foot in my mouth
22) Starting the ball rolling
23) Going over the edge
24) Picking up the pieces
Happy Exercising!